HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!

So once again I grow a year older. Didn't really do too much (actually I did nothing). Co workers and boss took me out to lunch, my aunt gave me a gift certificate to our favorite spa for a facial, and I came home to get on the Internet (one of the tenants in my apartment has not realize that they did not lock their wireless) and to talk on the phone to my friends/love ones.

This is not a bad thing because usually I do not celebrate my birthdays. I just do not like a lot of attention on me like that. However it did make me think about birthdays in the past.

I am 27 and I believe that I have been single for every birthday I have had in my twenties. WOW!!!!!

So with that being said, I am looking at all the men that are currently in my life. I am not on a romantic level with none of these gentlemen (well maybe two/a couple of them wish we were), but I make it an effort to call them, if not at MIDNIGHT, on their birthday. These NINE gentlemen (I am starting to use this word loosely now) know how important I take birthdays and some of them I talk to just yesterday/last week!!!! Out of the nine men, TWO called and wished me a happy birthday.

Really?

Will I be taking this too far if I start to distance myself from these individuals? I ask this because I find it curious that I can talk to these people all the time (emails, facebook, phone, text, etc.), but only TWO can take the time to call and wish me a damn happy birthdaaaaay!!!

Whatever............

Kanye West's 808s & Heartbreak

Okay you guys. I have been a little quiet when it came to my man Kanye because I thought that he had a breakdown. I was not feeling the song "Love Lockdown". Kanye singing? Nah....... However since he is my man (of course only in my mind) I have to stick by him through THICK AND THIN. I am glad that I did because I am loving the CD. Now it is kind of depressing and if you are in a funky mood, it will not cheer you up. Nevertheless I am feeling it. If anything, the album proves once and for all what an incredible artist my man is!!

My favorite song is HEARTLESS!!!




My man is so creative!!!

I am also loving "Say You Will"





This one is called "Welcome to the Heartbreak"






Okay that is all I can give ya. Since I actually "bought" this album, I am going to need for you go out and support my man. LOL!!

A conversation with my Madea

I called my great-grandmother (Madea) for her birthday and instead of talking about her (which she loves to do), she wanted to talk about me! Here is how some of the conversation went:

Madea: I am worried about you!
Me: Why?
Madea: You are about to be 26 and you have no man and no chaps (means children). Why is that?
Me:I just have not found one yet.
Madea: Didn’t I tell you want you need to do to get and keep a man?
Me: Yes ma’am
Madea: Well what the hell (my name was inserted here)! This is when I knew she was drunk. What are you doing up there? What did I tell you? Its four simple rules.
Me: I know. Getting aggravated because this entire conversation is being heard by a friend guy while we were on our way to grab a bite to eat! What makes it worse is that I know she wants me to recite them and I do not want to in front of ole dude, but I do. You always said in order to get and/or keep a man I needed to know how to keep a clean house (CHECK), make them laugh (CHECK), keep their belly’s full (I can cook my ass off! LOL), and screw their brains out (her words not mine! Actually hers were a lot worse)
Madea: AGAIN, if you know this why you single chile? Now she sound worried.
Me: Its not my time, but trust Madea I am okay, I have to go now about to go eat with a man.
Madea: Sounds happy again. Is it a boyfriend or potential one?
Me: No.
Madea: Worry comes back in her voice. Fuck it. I give up. Yall chaps drive me crazy. Have fun.
Me: Love you Madea!
Madea: Love you to baby!
Me: Bye!
Madea: Bye!

So this is my mama side of the family, and on my mama side of the family I am the FIRST one to NOT have a child as a teenager and to obtain a college degree. I think she is scared of me being alone because she never envision any of her family members achieving what I have (to me I feel I have not achieve that much, but to them I have achieve a lot). So I entertain her ideas of what I should do.

Mr. West!!

So I have read somewhere that my future husband (pictured above) has a reality show in the works with HBO. They will basically follow him around and give us a peek of what goes on in his life.

What that means for me? Well I do not have to quit my job to follow him around. I can basically stalk him from the comfort of my living/bedroom! LOL.

This relationship is costing me money already! I have to go and get HBO! LOL

Spiritual Sunday -- Praying for my future husband

This is not one of those, “Please God send me a man!” prayers. I am not ASKING for a man, more of me praying for the man I KNOW is coming into my life. I have faith that God is going to bring my “Godly Man” to me, but I just want to pray for him. God completely knows my future husband already. He knows his thoughts, struggles, triumphs, fears, and failures. So if I am praying daily for myself to become a better child of God, I feel that it only right for me to do this for my future mate. By praying for him, I am seeing that things can change for me. I see myself trying to become a better person, and a better child of God. I want to obtain a purer heart, all this in preparation for him, my future husband. For that reason, I will be making this a daily commitment.

It’s the least I can do (pray for him) because the person God has chosen for me is probably facing struggles just like me. So I will pray that God bless him and his family, order his day, encourage him in the Lord (want him to love God more than me), and in some way know that his future mate (me of course! LOL) is out there getting herself ready for him.

For example:
“God please watch over him today, bless his family and true friends.” God I ask that you give him strength to live each day to the fullest and continue to strive to be a better child to You. Please provide him with the strength to be able to resist worldly desires so that he can live in THIS world, but not OF it.”

I also pray for a Godly understanding of what a real relationship/marriage is suppose to be. For someone who I can be better with and we can help each other grow spiritually. I want me and my mate to be equally yoke. Meaning I want him to be on the level I am or above. Meaning all the superficial things I used to ask for is going out the window. God knows what I am attractive to and I trust that whomever God put in my life I will be attractive to him. So why must we ask for physical features when we are asking God for a mate? With me offering my thoughts and prayers to God, I want to set my heart and mind on a completely different track. Instead of being upset/depress about not having a mate, I want to be excited/have anticipation about my “relationship”. Because even though it does not exist at the moment, I KNOW that it’s going to happen (again at His perfect timing), and I KNOW that it will be worth the wait!!

I also made a list of things that were important to me, things I considered important characteristics/qualities for my future mate to have. I placed it in my Bible and handed it over to God. If God does not bring this man I described on paper to me, it will be okay. I will be happy with whatever God wills me in this life time. When you give yourself, along with your problems and concerns to God, and also honor Him, He will give back to you one-hundred fold!! So I am going to pray for your future mate and his intentions, then just wait for God to bring this individual into my life.

Things to do this summer

Being that I am dating myself, here are some things I want to do this summer:

1. Learn how to play pool better. When I was younger my grandparents owned a nightclub right next door to my house, and me and her (my grandmother) use to hustle men out of there money in pool games. I was really good back then.
2. Walk a 5K. Lets be honest, that’s all I can really do for now and I have to start somewhere.
3. Going to TWO concerts with friends (or by myself).
4. Search myspace and look for independent artists in my area. Because right now radio SUCKS!!!
5. Since I have reconnect with so many childhood friends through myspace, once a week, contact one and catch up.
6. At least once this summer, take in a “Movie in the Park” and “Concert in the Park”.
7. Since I grew up on baseball/softball, I found a park that has a league near me. Now I will not be participating (LOL), but I will attend a game or two.
8. Go to Stone Mountain and climb the damn mountain.
9. Go to Six Flags and the water park
10. Read at least THREE books (pertaining to history)
11. Go to some “Jazz Night” events.
12. Go to a reggae bar and meet a man with an accent and just listen to him talk. However I will not exchange phone numbers, just want to live with the fantasy.
13. Get involve in a spades tournament or just have a spades party.
14. Learn how to play chess
15. Go see the play, “The Color Purple” (well I will be doing this in July)
    
    

Dating MYSELF

So it is Saturday and I am back at home from my date with myself. Yep I wrote that correctly, I am dating myself. If you saw the youtube clip before reading this, aside from the humor, it was informative (at least for me). I talk a good game to everybody about how I am happy and just concentrating on me, but sometimes it gets hard and today is one of those days. I had to turn lemons into lemonade. I got out of bed, turned the TV off since it is a "no TV day" (will post about later) and commence to cleaning my room and my bathroom (remember that I live with my aunt, so those are the only areas I use). Cleaning was an ALL DAY (well 3 hours) job, and after that I gave myself an "in-home" spa treatment. After the spa, I did my hair like I went to a stylist and applied makeup to my face. Then I put a fly but casual outfit (you know, to look like I really did not try to dress up, but it just looked like I did) and decided to go see a movie, have a drink afterward, and grab a bite to eat. Now this is nothing new, I am not afraid and actually enjoy doing things by myself. However I do not do them on the weekends during "date hours". Nevertheless it was enjoyable and I am planning on have a "date night" with myself once a week or once every other week. I also purposely limited my conversations with female friends today because I know they would have wanted to join me and:

1. It would have defeated the purpose of going on a date with myself.
2. It would have turned into a girls night out which would have included talking about men and how much more fun it would have been if men were with us.
3. They would have gotten on my nerves checking men out, or complaining and whining about couples being mushy or just because they see a couple.

Anyway, the movie "Babymama" was great! 2 thumbs up! Went to a bar and had 2 Lemon drop martinis, and then to Chili's and got a to-go order. Now I am at home fulled and a little buzzed (drunk 2 glasses of wine with my food). To some this may seem pitiful, but actually it made me feel better. I have to practice what I preach!! Yesterday I went to Borders and spent 2 hours there having a blast with all the books (again I am an undercover nerd! LOL) and today I took myself to the movies and out to eat. So I should be sufficient until next weekend.

Next week: Go to a Jazz club!!!